And, well, so far i hope i don't sound like those bastards that have so much pride in their past successes and can't stop boasting about it. If i do, i hope i can save myself from drowning even further here.
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Failing to realize my either plan A or B, i was a little bit relieved by the fact that i could now dominate the academic league in my school. i was ready.
However, the awaited breakthrough did not come, and for reasons that are still not certain.
i have my own guesses:
1. Perhaps, i had never recovered from the failure to seize the opportunity to go to Singapore.
2. i watched too much of Joanna Alexandra
i watched the clip even during showering. i guess you can't blame me when there is such a cute girl in a video clip.
3. i might have slept a little too much. i had never finished learning the exam material since my first year in high school. And, in many instances, i simply fell asleep.
4. i just lost the spark
As you can guess, my high school life then went to a little bit different direction. No longer focusing only on the academic result, i went to try new things and make new friends with different kinds of people; from the nice students to the semi-bad students. But, i have never been in the real bad ass' group. it never suits me.
The most significant change was that my music library increased dramatically. i used to hate music, and i stupidly thought that was cool. the reason was simply that Shinichi Kudo, the famous detective back then, also sucked at it.
since i started loving music, let's have another video here! it was an extremely famous song during my high school year. It just gives you that epic feel!
Jack of all trades
And, without realizing it, i started becoming jack of all trades master of none during those years too. i signed up for basketball CCA in my first year, pingpong in the second, and football in the third. And, those abandoned interests have mounted now!
As expected, my academic performance started to weaken. i started to ride on my luck. And, luck in fact was the only thing to keep me afloat.
Yet, somehow, i still managed reaching the 2nd place for a physics competition, winning a scholarship in a rather unknown university, passing the national examination entry to a government university in Indonesia, getting in the first-category for a well-known private university in Indonesia, and, finally, got my golden ticket to Singapore.
And, in that journey, i had signed up or almost signed up to major in: IT, civil engineering, interior design, medicine, urban planning, nursery, math, and, of course, business.
Sooo, yeah, as many of you know, i finally fulfilled my dream to come to my promised land, Singapore. Yes, it was by luck too. However, how forgetful i am! A few months in the new island, i started to think that i might still have that spark to spark at least once more. The little hope was easily waned though. i realized i would not get much more lucky than this. True enough, after four and a half year, i could only manage to pass with the lowest allowed GPA, beyond that you are treated as a non-human.
Ironically, i still took pride in myself for the fact that i've got my degree in a good school, and still manage to get a humane GPA level. it is really disgustingly amazing that i could still find reasons to be proud of myself.
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