how many times we try to determine our fate, our lives?
some people, i heard, are successful.
they plan to get mba at this time, they get it.
they plan to get married at this time, they get it.
they plan that, they get that.

but, unfortunately, or fortunately, i am not one of those.
i used to be do not care at all about planning,
until i realized that i needed to start planning.
start to determining the course of my life.

i tinker, i plan, i execute it carefully although careful is not really embedded well in the genes.
and, i thought that i could put back my life back on course with this "planning".

quite sometimes after that,
now i am looking back at what has come to pass.
amazingly, praise God, which means fortunately,
most of my plans went bust.

not that i am proud of it, in fact i am puzzled.
sometimes, it really does feel like there are these invisible hands at work.
and sometimes, it feels like these hands don't negotiate.
when your plan seems like going to work just nice,
the hands snatched it away. leaving you to ponder why.

but it is okay!
because, whenever i look back at my life.
all difficulties are just like exams.
somehow, i'll get over it.
and, in hindsight, the hands often are right.